what “starting fresh” actually looks like when you’re not new

growth isn’t a reset - it’s refinement.

i’ve always loved a clean slate. a fresh start feels like possibility — a deep breath for your life. i’ve reinvented myself more times than i can count, not because i was necessarily lost, but because i believe in growth. people love to say “some people never change,” but that’s never been true for me. i’ve changed, outgrown, and rebuilt whole chapters of my life — sometimes quietly, sometimes in full public view — because i believe we’re meant to evolve.

when i moved to LA, i had less than two thousand dollars to my name and a suitcase full of hope. i was in my twenties, equal parts brave and naïve, and somehow landed a new job within a month. i remember the feeling of it — showing up to an office in real clothes instead of a uniform, working regular hours, thinking, this is it. i was proud. i felt grown. it felt like i had finally “made it.”

and it was good — until it wasn’t. i learned fast, worked hard, and within a year, it was clear i’d outgrown the role. so when the next opportunity came along — joining a brand-new real estate team that wasn’t even a team yet — i jumped. it felt like another fresh start. another chance to do it right this time.

and in a lot of ways, it was. over the next 13 years, we built that team into something real — over a billion dollars in sales, hundreds of clients, and more late nights than i can count. i’ve been responsible for over 1,000 transactions and counting, which is way above average in this industry — most agents might close around 200 in their entire career.

sometimes a fresh start doesn’t mean you’re walking into a brand new life. sometimes it just means you’re carrying the old one with a little more self-awareness. and that’s not failure — that’s growth.

i used to think “starting over” meant clearing the table and building something entirely new. now i think it just means building differently. smarter. slower. with more intention.

real estate taught me that. it gave me thick skin, good instincts, and the ability to talk to absolutely anyone about anything. but passion? not really. i’m great at it, but it’s never been the thing that lights me up inside. for a long time i thought that meant i was ungrateful or lazy — like i should’ve been more satisfied with what i built. but the truth is, you can be proud of something and still be ready to outgrow it.

and that’s where the real “fresh start” happens — in the decision to keep evolving even when you’re already very capable. because sometimes success starts to feel like a chore.

i’ve had so many of those moments. graduating high school, going to hair school, working for a bit, heading to college, moving across the country, trying my hand at production (because LA.), and somehow ending up here. it’s not a straight line, but it’s mine. and every step has benefited me in some way. i might not cut hair anymore, but i understand the color wheel. i might not work retail, but i’ve built a career in sales. every season gave me something useful — people skills, communication, patience, adaptability.

so when i talk to women who say, “i feel behind,” i get it. i’ve felt that, too. but here’s what i’ve learned: “being behind” is a made-up metric created by people who aren’t living your life. they’re measuring you against something that doesn’t apply to you — and half the time, they’re not even doing what you’re doing. there’s no such thing as behind when it comes to living your own life.

the older i get, the more i realize there’s no magic formula for how things are supposed to unfold. you can have all the timelines, the goals, the five-year plans — and still end up somewhere completely different, sometimes better. the point was never to get it “right.” it was to learn as you go and try to enjoy the process where and while you can.

fresh starts aren’t about reinvention for the sake of it. they’re about honoring who you’ve become and choosing again from that place. and that version of you — the one who’s seen some things, who’s failed and learned and kept going — she’s the one who can actually handle what’s next.

so if you’re in that weird in-between space — the one where you’re ready for something new but not sure how to start — maybe don’t burn it all down. you don’t need to be new. you just need to be here, with everything you’ve learned, and decide what gets to come with you.

because sometimes a fresh start doesn’t need to look dramatic. sometimes it just needs to look like today.